


Starlight all around us

by TheGD



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Genderfluid Crowley (Good Omens), Idiots in Love, Light Angst, Multi, Stargazing, Weddings, Wooing, skylights, thickheadedness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-08-20 08:08:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20224585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGD/pseuds/TheGD
Summary: “Nobody will be watching us for seven years, we can do whatever we want”. That last bit was said with just the tiniest bit of seduction. Just enough to allow the angel to think anything he wanted to and not a specific activity.“I…” He said doubtfully, looking at his feet.“Think about it”. Crowley said and left without another word. A very confused angel stayed at the clearing watching her go.-------------Crowley wants to take full advantage of their time at the Dowling’s. Aziraphale wants the same but Crowley just can’t take a hint.





	Starlight all around us

**Author's Note:**

> Hey my dears!! I’m addicted to the Dowling era and there aren’t enough fics about it (in my opinion) so I decided to write one. I hope you enjoy it!!

One of the best things about being eternal is that you have enough time to burry your pain deep enough that you can do the thing that originated it again and again. One would think that living forever allows you to figure things out and to live your life in a straight, certain line; but in reality it is just a wider circle, wide enough that sometimes you can’t see the curve. In Crowley’s case, the pain has always been originated by people- the things they did, the things they didn’t do, the way they lived, the way they died. Always people, children more often than not. The pain of the big flood is a dull ache at the back of his soul, only being able to save a dozen of them; nightmares of a black snake wrapped around them all day and all night, the waves crashing agains the ark. Sometimes his senses play tricks on him and the air smells like the countless plagues that kept him up at night. The wooden wheels of the body collectors’ carts splashing on the wet streets, Crowley walking around touching his hand to their burning foreheads and spending all of his miracles on them. He told them to stay inside and not touch anyone. Sometimes they would listen, sometimes his miracles would be in vain.

Not every pain is as tragic as those. At least once per millennia he’ll befriend a child that needs him and he’ll dote on the little one until they’re no longer little and no longer need him. She’ll watch them die from the sidelines and remember the way their faces looked on the day she met them. She remembers all of their faces, not a single one forgotten. She has buried so many children, just like she has buried the pain; them six feet underground, her pain at an ineffable depth in her black soul. She loves, she cares, she loses, she buries: that is her circle and she was about to start it all over again.

Warlock was so sweet, he looked like a cloud all bundled up in his white blanket. A cloud that fairly soon would bring the world to an end. Although if Crowley and the angel did their jobs right that would be avoided.

“Your CV is impressive Ms. Ashtoreth, it seems you’ve been caring for kids since the dawn of time”. Said Mrs. Dowling, unknowingly speaking the truth.

“One could say so, Mrs. Dowling. It’s a blessing and a curse having a job like this”. Said Crowley, looking at the baby and remembering all of her kids.

“Yes, I can only imagine. Look at him, he’s responding so well to you!”

“Oh he’s the calmest babe I’ve ever seen”.

“Only with you. Well, I think this interview is over-“ said Mrs. Dowling and Crowley’s stomach dropped, thinking for a brief second that she wasn’t going to get hired, but then the other woman continued “-welcome to the Dowling household, let me show you to your room”.

Her earthly possessions were placed in the room next to Warlock’s nursery so she could be close at all times. Elegant blue walls and dark wood furniture, quite sparse, just the way she liked it. Her carpet bag and a 1854, original, Louis Vuitton trunk were all that she had brought. In one of the trunk’s drawers there were her gray satin sheets and a deep green duvet, fluffy and warm; the trunk was definitely bigger on the inside. She made her bed and was quite pleased with the color scheme. Black would attract too much attention but grey and green were formal yet elegant, just like she was.

By the time she was done, Warlock was hungry so she hugged him to her chest and went downstairs to find him a bottle. She met the cook and other members of the staff, taking special care of being polite yet aloof. Everyone looked a little intimidated after the encounters. Good. Her angel would for sure make friends with everyone so she didn’t have to.A week passed quickly between tears, milk and otherbaby bodily fluids. By Saturday she was really craving a good drink and a chat but the angel was nowhere to be seen. He had probably lost track of time because of a really good book, yes that was probably it. The night of her first Sunday, as she was feeding Warlock yet again, standing by the nursery’s window, Mrs. Dowling came in. Of course Crowley heard her come in but she decided not to turn around, so the young mother could start talking in her own time.

“I’m so glad we found you, Nanny”. She looked at her son and his Nanny and smiled, they looked peaceful.

“And I’m glad I found you too, Mrs. Dowling”. Said Crowley turning around. “If you don’t mind me asking, who lives in that cottage at the end of the property? I hadn’t seen the light on in all week”.

“Oh it’s the new gardener, Mr. Francis. A good man, if a little odd”.

“Odd how?” Oh for Satan’s sake, what had the angel done now?

“You’ll meet him tomorrow so you can see it for yourself”. She said, bid her goodnights to baby and Nanny and left.

Sometime later Crowley lay in her bed staring a the ceiling, trying to guess what the angel had done and laughing silently. Warlock started to cry so she went to get him. The rocking chair was miraculously placed in front of the window, as it had been since she arrived. The night was cloudy but there was a small patch of dark sky, a single star shining against it. Warlock was looking up at her and she couldn’t help but smile. If she still had the power to name stars she would name that one Warlock, shining through despite all odds, a defiance to the world and its cloudy sky. She may not have the power, but who will know,really, if she whispers to the boy “That star is yours, my demon child, never forget to look up at the sky”. She stayed like that all night, rocking the sleeping bundle in her arms.

The next morning she decided to take young master Warlock for a stroll and hopefully find Aziraphale to satisfy her curiosity. He was standing near a freshly planted tree, his back to her.

“You must be the new gardener”. She said with her soft Scottish voice.

“Yes, and you must be the nanny and young master Warlock. I’m brother Francis, pleased to meet you”. He said turning around. Oh lord.

“Delighted”. She said, she wasn’t delighted at all. “That new tree needs to be watered after being planted”.

“I knew that already, of course. But thank you”. Said Aziraphale, with a smile. Crowley couldn’t stop staring at those teeth. And the sideburns, oh my dark lord, the sideburns!

“Anytime. I must keep going. Nice to meet you”. She extended her hand and slipped a small folded paper into the angels hand. To any onlookers it would look like a normal handshake. The paper read ‘meet me at the clearing at 2200 hours’. Crowley walked away trying really hard not to laugh and wake up Warlock who was sleeping in his pram.

At night Crowley changed into her gray nightgown and robe andwent to check on Warlock one more time before going to find the angel. She opened the door that connected their rooms and found Mrs. Dowling there.

“Oh I’m sorry Mrs. Dowling, I didn’t know you were here”. She said, tightening her robe around her.

“Don’t worry about it, Nanny, I just wanted to see my little angel”.

“I should go”.

“Stay. How was your day?” Asked Harriet tentatively, shyly.

“It was nice. I met the gardener and let me tell you, you were right about him, funny fellow”.

“I don’t think I could live with teeth like that”. They both laughed wholeheartedly, if a little silently as to not disturb Warlock. It felt warm and friendly and Crowley didn’t know how to respond to that. He had never had a friend before, aside from Aziraphale, that is. In Hell there was no friendship and in heaven it was a rare thing because everyone’s affections were always directed towards the Almighty. Maybe Lucifer had been his friend once, before the fall, but maybe it had just been strong admiration. Sure, he had made friends with a couple of humans before, but he had always been there with an ulterior motive, now he was only here to care for a child and prevent the end of the world so she didn’t count that as an ulterior motive. They tucked Warlock in and said good night.

She walked quickly, robe billowing behind her as she approached the clearing. The angel was already there, standing in the middle, smiling down at some flowers that were blooming around his feet. He looked positively angelic.

“I though you weren’t coming”. Loudly whispered Aziraphale as he saw her coming.

“Have I ever missed a date, angel?”

“I suppose not. So what is it you wanted to tell me? I like the new look by the way, reminds me of the begging”.

“Thanks-ugh” Stammered Crowley not knowing what to say. She hoped the darkness would hide her blush. She continued “I was thinking we should have weekly meetings, to talk about Warlock’s evolution”.

“That’s a fine idea”. He said. They were silent for a few seconds, observing the vast gardens around them and the little flowers at their feet. 

“Angel?” Crowley broke the silence.

“Yes, dear?”

“We’re alone”. She said. It was now or never.

What she meant was that heaven had found out that Crowley was going to influence the Antichrist so they thought it best to send Aziraphale to counteract. Yes, the antichrist was supposed to be evil and end the world, but they feared that if he was extremely evil, he would magically convert angels to Hell’s side and therefore seriously tip the scale in their favor. That could not be allowed so they had send Aziraphale, not to influence Warlock, as he was doing, but to simply thwart the demon’s plans. Hell found out about this and, although influencing the child wasn’t originally their plan, they decided to go with it.

“Yes, and?” Asked the angel.

“Nobody will be watching us for seven years, we can do whatever we want”. That last bit was said with just the tiniest bit of seduction. Just enough to allow the angel to think anything he wanted to and not a specific activity.

“I…” He said doubtfully, looking at his feet.

“Think about it”. Crowley said and left without another word. A very confused angel stayed at the clearing watching her go.

It soon became a routine for Mrs. Dowling and Crowley to take turns lulling Warlock to sleep while talking about their days in hushed voices. Both of them wearing pj’s and smiling openly without anyone watching.

“I’m so tired, Lilith”. Said Harriet one day.

“Being a new mother is not an easy job”.

“But you do most of it and all I really do is sleep. I think there might be something wrong with me”.

“Perhaps you should talk to a therapist, it helps”. She had never tried it herself, how could she possibly explain the ancient origins of her pain, but she had heard wonders of it.

“Has this happened to you?”

“Plenty of times, one time it got so bad I slept for…what felt years”.

“But you look so strong, Lilith”. Harried said, looking at the floor, tears at her eyes.

“Even the strongest struggle, there’s nothing wrong with that”. She wanted to believe that to be true. Some days she felt so weak, her chest riddled with graves as old as time. The pain would keep her awake, the pain would make her sleep. In recent times, dinning, drinking and talking with Aziraphale as often as they could, had helped her heal a little bit. Well, maybe not heal, but at least stop thinking about it for a while. She was weak, she was strong, she carried on.

After putting Warlock to bed, she and Harriet said goodnight and Crowley would go to bed and dream of imposible things such as love. Once a week she would go meet the angel at the clearing. After a month of following that routine, a bench magically appeared so the demon and the angel could seat down. Cheeky bench, it took it long enough to appear.

“Who will be doing your job while we’re here?” Asked the angel, after finishing talking about Warlock’s progress.

“Someone without finesse or understanding of humans”. Replied the demon sighing, they hadn’t talked about ‘the outside’ in a while.

“That could be any demon, Crowley”. Aziraphale laughed a little bit.

“That’s true but this one is the worst”.

“Hastur?”

“Yeah. You?” That froggy bastard lacked all of the artistry Crowley naturally had.

“Someone without finesse or understanding of humans”.

“Angel…” Said Crowley, lovingly exasperated at the angel for turning her phrase back against her.

“Uriel”.

“Ah what a ray of sunshine. You know she actually was a ray of sunshine in the beginning”.

“Really?”

“Yeah, she was quite beautiful, everything was beautiful”.

“Somethings still are, my dear”. Said the angel looking directly at Crowley. She turned away, her hair falling into her face, effectively hiding her blush. Stupid demon, he probably meant the starts, not you! She excused herself saying that tomorrow was a busy day. It wasn’t a lie, everyday was busy with a baby and the demon needed her beauty sleep. That night the baby didn’t wake up in the middle of the night so Crowley could have uninterrupted dreams of her angel.

Warlock was growing incredibly fast, it felt like Crowley blinked and the kid was crawling, she blinked again and he was standing up in his crib, attempting to flee. The dizzying speed of time had to do with the fact that she was eternal but also because that was the nature of babies. Every parent felt like it was only a few minutes between the birth of their kids and their farewell party when they left for college. Parents said goodbye many times: goodbye on the first day of school, goodbye at their first solo trip, goodbye at the altar; but none too permanent if they were lucky. Some parents said the same goodbyes Crowley had had to say countless times; some would survive, some would kill themselves and Crowley honestly didn’t blame them. She would soon loose this love but for now she could only cherish him.

Warlock eyes were always lively, looking for something to grab or something to stare intently at, trying to figure out the internal workings of everything. He particularly liked Nanny’s hair and his mother’s wedding ring. He was also partial to Brother Francis’ sideburns and Crowley would tell the angel that he probably liked them because he thought they were dog fur. The baby boy was crawling and trying to walk on the grass while Crowley watched over him. A yellow daffodil suddenly came into her field of view.

“For you Ms. Ashtoreth”.

“Ah, well, thank you Mr. Francis”. Said Crowley not knowing what to do with it or what to say.

“Yellow is such a beautiful color. Top of the morning to you”. Said the angel cheerfully before going back to his plants.

Later that night she came into the nursery to find Harriet already there with a cheeky smile on her face.

“Spit it out”. Said Crowley.

“Nanny and Francis sitting on a tree, k-i-s-“

“Oh shut it! You saw that?”

“Yes! He likes you”. The young woman was beyond herself of happiness. There was nothing quite like a good romance to cheer her up.

“I’m sure it was just a friendship flower”. Said Crowley trying to end the conversation.

“There’s no such thing as friendship flower”.

“Nonsense, a friend of mine has given me flowers plenty of times”. That was true, Aziraphale had given him a flower at Eden, placing it on his hair to bring out his eyes, he had said. Over the centuries, an edelweiss that reminded him of the stars; some hydrangeas to lighten up her living room; fragrant jasmine for his lapel and countless others.

“Then perhaps he wanted to be more than a friend”.

“Nonsense, Harriet Dowling, utter nonsense”. Said the demon with a contained smile. Maybe Harriet was right but most likely she was wrong. Friendship flowers are definitely a thing.

Harriet left a bit early to see if she could catch her husband still awake, leaving Crowley alone with the baby. Warlock refused to sleep and kept staring at the ceiling. When he saw Nanny he stretched his arms toward her and said “Na-y!”. Crowley’s hearts broke, it shattered and it came back together just to shatter again. How can someone be so happy and so sad? Her tears didn’t start drying until she began to walk towards the clearing.

That day Crowley got to the bench first, her head leaning back looking at the stars. She willed some of the light pollution away so he could see more clearly. Taking her glasses off also helped but she wasn’t going to do it, was she? Yellow is such a beautiful color, she herd his words in her head. She folded her glasses and placed them in her robe pocket.

“The stars are nice today”. Said the angel as he arrived.

“Thank you”.

“I brought some hot cocoa. I was thinking we haven’t gone out for dinner in a whole year”.

“Being a Nanny is a full-time job, although now that Warlock sleeps though the night we could do it. Our free days are not the same though, I’d have to ask permission”.

“There’s this new Italian place in the village, the cook told me it is quite good”.

“I’ll ask Mrs. Dowling tomorrow”. She said. They shared the cocoa and talked. Most days there would be an abyss between them on the bench. Some days, for example today, when Warlock had said his first word, and Crowley’s world had crumbled around her, they sat a little bit closer. It was a lovely night, something else Crowley would have to burry in case she survived the great war.

Harriet was going to tease her to death, she could feel it already. Even her hands were sweating although they had no reason to be. It’s not like she was going on a date or anything.She was absolutely not going to tell her about last night’s cocoa because she would claim it was romantic cocoa instead of just friendly cocoa as Crowley knew it was. She found her friend and employer in the kitchen, talking to the cook about a menu. The cook conveniently fled as she walked in.

“Harriet, may I ask a favor of you? And I swear to Go-to goodness that if you laugh I’ll seek revenge”.

“What is it”. Said Harriet smiling, her intuition already telling her something was up.

“Francis invited me to have dinner in town but our free days don’t line up-“

“I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!” The young woman jumped up and down.

“I told you not to laugh!”

“I’m not laughing, I’m celebrating. The best Nanny in the world deserves some love even if it is from Brother Francis”.

“It’s just a friendly dinner.”

“It is not, trust me”.

“I’ve been invited to plenty of friendly dinners over the years”.

“By the same guy that gave you friendly flowers?” Harriet asked.

“Ngh, yes, ok?” Crowley was blushing hard now, she turned away and hopped that her boss couldn’t see it.

“Just remember my words when brother Francis kisses you after dinner”.

“Not going to happen”.

“Mark my words”. Harriet said pseudo-wisely.

Since they asked to go for dinner as Nanny and brother Francis they decided not to change their appearances just in case someone saw them in town. Crowley decided to wear a black dress with a little (very little) cleavage and a dark green trench coat just to spice thing up. As she was leaving her room Harriet ambushed her and teased her to no end about how she had dressed up for Francis. She of course hadn’t dressed up for Francis! She just enjoyed fashion and being a nanny didn’t allow for that very often. Harriet had lend her one of the cars and she nervously fiddled with the keys as she waited for Francis at the door. She wasn’t used to driving other people’s cars but oh well, she was going to scare it into submission if necessary. Francis arrived wearing one of Aziraphale’s usual suits, with minor tweaks to make it less perfect and to fit his slightly larger body. The ridiculous sideburns and teeth were the same but he looked good anyways. They drove there in silence and upon arriving at the restaurant Crowley actually parked the car in a legal parking space. At the restaurant they had a reservation on the name of Francis Fell and the hostess showed them to their candlelit table.

“Our best table for a date”. She said before leaving. They blushed and didn’t say anything.

Dinner was indeed good, the cook was right. Scrumptious lasagna for the angel, risotto for the demon, who almost ordered capelli di angelo just to tease Aziraphale but decided not to in the end.

“You are quiet dearest. Is your food not good?”

“It’s great, angel”.

“Then what is it?” He put his cutlery down, worried.

“I’m really happy”. Said Crowley sadly.

“Me too, the restaurant is great!”

“I mean in general, I’m happy everyday and I know that can’t last”.

“Oh dear…I’m happy too. Let’s just take it one day at a time, ok? Not think about the future”.

“I’ll try”.

“Good. Let me tell you the story of when I accidentally invented lasagna”.

Oh dear, that angel was hilarious, scrumptious, good, sinful, and so many other things that Crowley didn’t have the words for. The candlelight made his hair look like a cloud in the moonlight, his eyes were sparkling just for her. No, not for her, they were just sparkling because that’s what angel’s eyes do. The ride back to the house was quiet but comfortable. After parking the car at the garage, Aziraphale asked her if she would care for a nightcap. She said yes, of course.

At the breakfast table Warlock was yelling “‘anana, ‘anana!”

“Yes dear, banana. Now you just need to scare that ‘b’ into submission”

“You came back very late, Lilith, and I couldn’t help but notice that you didn’t go straight to your room”. Said Harriet as she entered the kitchen.

“Francis invited me over for drinks”.

“So that’s what they’re calling it nowadays”.

“The man has great taste in Scotch, that’s all”. Crowley mumbled while trying to dodge some banana that Warlock sent flying through the air.

“Yes I can tell he likes his Scots”.

“You’re insufferable”. You little shit. But of course Nanny wasn’t going to swear un front of the baby. 

“By the way, I changed your free days so they always line up, you’re welcome”. Harriet said, leaving before Crowley could say thanks. Not that she would’ve said thanks if Harriet had stayed longer.

At noon she was reading quietly as Warlock had a nap. Mr. Dowling walked by and peered into the nursery.

“Ms. Ashtoreth, good to see you”. He said with his charming manly man voice.

“Likewise Mr. Dowling”.

“May I ask you a couple of questions?”

“Certainly”. She said. They went into his office and he offered her a drink, which she politely declined. He swirled his own drink around the glass while looking at her. Crowley saw his eyes roam her chest, her legs and finally settle on her long fingers, crossed on her lap. Crowley decided to give him the benefit of the doubt as to the meaning of that look.

“What do you think of Warlock?” He asked.

“He’s a wonderful boy, a bit mischievous but sensitive and with a good heart”.

“But not too sensitive, is he?” He said worriedly.

“Whatever do you mean, Mr. Dowling?”

“Sensitive, you know…like a bit of a sissy. The other day I saw him crying over a dead bee and I got worried”.

“He’s perfect Mr. Dowling I can assure you, now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for his snack.”

They exchanged the emptiest pleasantries to ever be exchanged by two people and Crowley left. She was so glad that trash of a man was only there for a couple of days out of every month. At the nursery, her little boy was with his mother and she was running out of stories to tell him. That happened every time Harriet was with the kid, she wasn’t a bad mother per se, she loved him very much but she just wasn’t very…creative or at least willing to make a big effort. She would always be fine for a few minutes and then the conversation or the games would dry out and she would start feeling nervous and inadequate. Some women weren’t meant for parenthood, some demons absolutely were.

“How’s my little darling doing?” She asked, going into the nursery.

“Nanny!” Exclaimed mother and son at once, relief and happiness.

“Can we go outside Nanny?”. Said Warlock.

“Yes my sweet child but first you need to eat something so you have strength for terrorizing the plants”.

They got his snack and ran out to meet Brother Francis who was still planting the plants. They were exotic trees that wouldn’t grow there without devine intervention. Crowley had only seen them once centuries ago in a trip to Africa. They were absolutely breathtaking trees.

“Francis, where did you get these from? They are astounding!” She said touching a leaf.

“Only the loveliest trees for the loveliest woman”.

“Well I’m sure Mrs. Dowling will appreciate them”.

“I got them for you, my dear”.

“Oh…Warlock sweetheart why don’t you go fill that watering can over there”. The boy nodded and ran to the faucet.“I-uh-thank you? I do like me a good exotic tree, very green”. What could she possibly say?

“You’re very welcome. See you later at the clearing?”

“Ugh yes, yes, everything according to plan”.

The day blurred by in a series of snacks, meals, tears, games and nighttime stories. With surprise, Nanny realized the stars were out already. Tonight Harriet had her husband to herself so she skipped their gossiping session. She left for the clearing early. Her slumped posture allowed her to rest her head on the back of the bench. It dug into her scalp but she could bear it, the sky was beautiful. Aziraphale sat beside her silently.

“That can’t be confortable, why don’t you lay down, I can hold your feet-“ Aziraphale interrupted himself as Crowley laid her head down on his lap. “-or that, that’s fine too”.

“Mr. Dowling believes Warlock is becoming a sissy”.

“He’s a very traditional man, I suppose”.

“He’s a bastard, that’s what he is. My boy is perfect just the way he is”.

“He’s not your boy, Crowley”. Said the angel sadly.

“He is for now”.

“My dear…”

“Let me have this years, angel, please”. Begging wasn’t her thing but right now it felt right. Warlock, Harriet, this bench and her angel were worth begging for.

“Ok”. He simply said.

They stayed there for several minutes, comfortable, warm silence despite the cold. Crowley had miracled the light pollution once again and was looking at the stars. She could almost feel their light on her skin, warming her for the first time in 6000 years. Perhaps it wasn’t the starlight that was warming her, but Aziraphale’s hands that had started to play with her hair without noticing. Crowley couldn’t help but groan when he reached her scalp.

“Oh I’m sorry dear, I didn’t realize I was doing that”.

“If you stop I’m never going out for dinner with you again”.

“Understood”. He said and he went on playing with Crowley’s hair, cold fire between his fingers.

The night was quite chilly and Crowley was shivering but she didn’t want to move; this was perfect, this was all she’d ever wanted. As she laid there, face up to the sky he could almost feel like she belonged to it and that it belonged to her. Her head on Aziraphale’s lap, her hair being caressed by the fingers that she loved and the starlight all around them, it was almost paradise again.

“You’re shivering, my dear!”

“It’s ok, angel”.

“No, it’s not! Come on, there’s a skylight above my bed, you’ll be warm and you can watch the stars”.

“Mk-ok”.

The angel gave her his warm fluffy robe and lead her to the cabin with a gentle hand on her back.

“Upstairs, door to the left, lay down and I’ll make us some tea”.

Half of the bed was unmade so she guessed that was Aziraphale’s side. She lay there just to annoy him. The covers were soft and the skylight was perfect. The tea was ready miraculously fast.

“Drink, we don’t need you to discorporate from hypothermia, my dear”. He said as he sat on the other side of the bed without complaining. After a while he asked her if she was feeling better.

“M-yeah, fine”. She was feeling more than better.

“You should get some sleep, Crowley”.

“Hint taken, thanks for the tea”. She said as she began standing up.

“I meant here, sending you outside would only thwart my efforts of warming you up”.

“And I, a demon, shouldn’t go around thwarting your plans”.

“Just sleep you wily snake, I’ll watch over you”.

She slept while he read. She was happy al through the night and it was some sort of miracle that Crowley woke up early enough that her walk back to the main house wasn’t a walk of shame. Aziraphale was already up and about when she went downstairs. Muttering something that sounded vaguely like thanks she left. At the house she checked in on Warlock, who was soundly asleep and took a long warm shower.

Later that day she was drinking tea and enjoying the sunshine with Warlock and Harriet. The garden was beautiful this time of year. Well, it was beautiful at any time of year thanks to Aziraphale’s miracles. Only that sly angel could get away with caring for a garden without knowing a single thing about plants. 

“You look nice when you smile, Nanny”.

“I don’t smile, Mrs. Dowling”.

“Sure you don’t, my friend. And how is he in bed?”.

“Who?”

“Francis of course”. Harriet smiled into her teacup. 

“How should I know”.

“You weren’t in your bed last night”.

“Before you say anything let me tell you it was only sleeping, fr-“

“If you say ‘friendly’ one more time I will fire you”.

“I was merely stating a fact”.

“If it was really just sleeping you absolutely need to make a move-“ Harriet was interrupted by Brother Francis voice coming from around the corner.

“My dear, good morning! Oh Mrs. Dowling I didn’t see you there”

“Brother Francis, good morning. I was just leaving, I’ll leave you two lovebirds alone”. She scurried away, leaving a very awkward silence behind. Francis sat in the spot she previously occupied.

“Be careful, child, you will need both feet for crushing your enemies”. Said Crowley to Warlock as he stumbled through the grass.

“Listen Crowley, I was wondering of you’d like to go to dinner tomorrow, I’ll ask for permission this time”. He asked without looking at her.

“I can’t tomorrow” She said cunningly.

“Oh” He sighted, disappointed.

“How about on Friday? Mrs. Dowling moved my free day”.

“That’s nice of her!” The angel sounded as exited as if he had some crepes in front of him. Crowley couldn’t help but smile, he was so beautiful when he got excited.

They dined at a different place, french this time and werealso given the best table for dates. People really needed to stop assuming things. As if readingher mind, the angel said.

“It really is the best table for dates”.

“Yes, we’ve been lucky twice in a row”.

“Oh it was no luck or miracle my dear, I phoned both restaurants myself and asked for their best table for dates”.

“Mngk-nice”. Stuttered Crowley. That meant…no, it didn’t. Could it? Nah. But really, what if? Shut it, you. Just think about it.

She was indeed thinking about it on the way back when Aziraphale grabbed her hand that was resting on the center console of the car. Her heart raced and the road became a bit blurry.

“Aziraphale I need my hand”

“Oh I’m sorry, didn’t mean to bother you”.

“You’re not bothering me but I’d rather not crash the car, it’s not as easy as the Bentley”. It was true, she really needed her hand for the curves.

“So, ah, would you care for a nightcap”. Aziraphale asked as they parked the car. An exact mirror of their previous dinner except for one thing.

“Yes but I need to get something from my room first”.

She changed into her nightgown and took of her makeup. This was the only ‘move’ she could think of making, as per Harriet’s suggestion. Aziraphale welcomed her into his home, into his bed and into his arms, even if the latter occurred subconsciously while they were sleeping. Staying over with the angel became a twice weekly occurrence. It was the same as always, drinks, talk and warmth, with the added bonus of sleep and the skylight.

“I could get used to this”. Said Crowley one day, many months later. Their feet brushing under the covers. 

“You could, we still have five years. It’s not a lot but it’s more than we’ve ever had”. Said the angel, tempting, with just the tiniest bit of seduction. Just enough to allow the demon to think anything she wanted of it and not a specific activity. Silence stretched for a few minutes. Crowley thought back to the flowers, the dinners, the compliments and the accidental touches. Perhaps Harriet was right. Could she be right? For Crowley’s sake let her be right.

“Come here, angel”. She hugged him tightly, not daring to kiss him yet but hopping that the hug communicated her 6000 years of love. They slept happily.

A plan had formed in Crowley’s head as soon as she had huggedthe angel. She thought about that hug all day long; feeding Warlock at breakfast, her heart fluttered as she thought about it; reading stories to Warlock, she nearly cried as the prince swore his sword to the princess. At lunch she couldn’t bear it anymore so she went to find Harriet.

“I’d like to take Warlock into town if that’s all right”.

“Of course it is. Actually why don’t I join you, I need to buy a couple of things”.

“Um-you could give me your list and I could buy them for you”.

“It’ll do me good to get out of the house”.

“But-“

“What are you hiding Nanny?” Harriet interrupted, her intuitive smile on her face.

“You’ll see when we get there”. Crowley gave up.

The chauffeur drove them into town, along with three of the secret service agents. They promised Warlock some ice cream if he behaved through the whole trip. First they bought some new shoes that Harriet had wanted, then they had to go into a bookshop to get Warlock some new reading material. And last but not least they went into a jewelry shop. Harriet asked if she needed some new earrings, Crowley shook her head no.

“Oh my god! Please tell me you’re going to propose”. Harriet said as they waited for the clerk, connecting the dots with her goddamned intuition.

“How may I help you, ladies?” Said the clerk with a smile.

“I’d like to see your engagement rings, for men if possible”.

“Sure thing ma’am, right this way”.

“I can’t believe it! I’m so happy for you, Lilith”.

“Don’t make a fuss about it”. How embarrassing, the clerk was smiling. Hopefully he wasn’t laughing at her for being a middle-aged woman that was going to propose to her man. 

“I’m an ordained minister and Warlock can be the ring bearer! You should buy the wedding rings right now!”. Harriet was definitely excited.

“He might say no”.

“There’s no way he’s going to say no, the man loves you since the first time he saw you, I’m sure”.

Could it be? Eden? Nah, no way.

That Friday Crowley broke into Aziraphale’s cottage with several bags filled to the brim with fresh ingredients. She was going to make the most scrumptious, sinful meal possible and then she was going to, very daintily, get down on one knee and propose to the angel because this years were theirs and theirs only and she was going to take full advantage of that.

“What are you doing here, Crowley”. Said the angel as he arrived.

“I’m making dinner”.

“Oh all right, my kitchen is your kitchen”.

She poured the angel a glass of wine and started cooking. They talked about Warlock and how human he was. They talked about how one of the maids always blushed when Francis talked to her, such odd taste, the poor lass.

“Mrs. Dowling and your are very close, right?” Aziraphale asked, alcohol coursing through his corporation’s veins.

“I suppose so”.

“She’s not a bad woman, you know? You should stop tempting her”.

“I’m not tempting her, she’s a friend”.

“Is that all she is?” Lord he was drunk.

“Of course! I only have eyes for one person”. Replied Crowley.

“Mr. Hansen, I should’ve known!”

“Angel you’re as dense as the cake I was going to make”. She was smiling a devilish smile.

“Was? What happened to the cake?”

“I’ll be too busy to make it”.

“With what?”

“‘With whom’, is the right question”.

“With whom?” The angel asked, still not connecting the dots.

“Oh for Satan’s sake!” she said, pulling the ring box put of his skirt pocket. “I was going to do this after dinner but you’re incredibly exasperating. Sober up please”.

The angel made that ‘sobering up’ face and sat up straighter, awaiting for something although he didn’t understand what. Crowley got down on one knee and opened the box.

“Will you marry me, Aziraphale?”

“My dear! Yes, yes I will marry you”. The angel said and he kneeled down on the floor in front of Crowley. There were mere inches between their faces and Aziraphale made sure there were none in a split second. The kiss was tender and filled with nearly 6000 years of longing. The Angel tasted like the wine he was drinking and something else, something like a fluffy dessert or a fizzy drink.

“We should do it tonight, in the clearing, just you and me and Harriet and Warlock”. She said, bringing their foreheads together.

“We don’t have wedding rings, or the proper clothes”.

“I bought these in case you might say yes”. Crowley said pulling out the golden bands. “As for the clothes, we can just wear this”.

“Pijamas?”

“Classy, sexy pijamas. It’s our wedding we can do whatever we want”.

“Oh all right” He conceded.

“I’ll go get the Dowlings”.

At the house, she knocked softly on Harriets door, who opened a few seconds later. The TV was still on although it was quite late.

“Is everything ok, Lilith?”

“Yes, will you marry us?”

“Marry you?” Harriet asked confused.

“As in ‘officiate the ceremony’”

“Oh yeah of course. When?”

“Right now”.

“In a hurry are we, Nanny?” She teased.

“Please”. She begged.

“I’ll go get the ring bearer”.

When they got to the clearing there was a path of white flowers and some fairy lights forming an archway between two trees. The angel was waiting under it already. Harriet grabbed her arm and walked her to the archway. Warlock looked at everything with curious but sleepy eyes, awaiting further instruction. Aziraphale place a flower in her hair and Harriet welcomed the attendees and started saying the words. When she got to the vows, Crowley looked stressed all of a sudden, she hadn’t prepared anything. Aziraphale squeezed her hand. He grabbed the ring that Warlock had brought at a signal from his mother and put it on Crowley’s slender finger. Taking initiative he started talking first.

“My darling, I have always been yours since the beginning but in these years that we have left I am only and only yours”. Aziraphale poured his heart into those words. His eyes were shining with tears of love, Crowley almost wanted to look away, almost. How could she possibly deserve this? She didn’t know but she started saying her vows anyways, tears at her eyes, her angel was so good.

“I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you-“

“I knew it!” Interrupted Harriet.

“Shut it! Anyhow…I will love you after the world goes up in flames and as long as time exists and even after that if I’m still alive”.

“I pronounce you husband and wife please kiss!” Said Harriet excitedly.

They kissed, and Warlock clapped and Harriet cried a little and hugged Crowley in a bone-crushing hug. The angel shook her hand and thanked her profusely for marrying them. Crowley spun with Warlock in her arms. She had never been so happy. She kissed the boy’s cheeks and then gave him to her mother. Harriet left hurriedly with a knowing glance. Hand in hand they went back to the cottage where some perfectly cold champagne awaited them.

“That was something, wasn’t it?” Said Aziraphale.

“It was perfect, angel”.

“You are perfect, my love”.

“You know what else I am? Incredibly sexy”. She was leaning against the kitchen counter. The angel stepped in front of her and gave her a once-over.

“Well I’ve always known that, since the very first day”. He said.

“Oh look at you, you wanton angel”. She grabbed him by his pijama’s lapels and pulled him towards her.

“Only for you my dear”.

The champagne was forgotten because, for once, they didn’t need alcohol to face reality. They went up to their room and kissed softly while lowering into their bed. Aziraphale kissed Crowley’s cheek and continued down her neck. Crowley opened her eyes and looked up to the skylight. The stars were impossibly bright that night, perhaps they somehow still felt their maker’s love and echoed it back to her. Or perhaps it was just a cross-country blackout, who knew. Crowley thought back to the first day Aziraphale offered her his bed with the excuse that she was freezing. She made an effort to remember the cabin as it had been before that day but she just couldn’t remember there being a skylight. Maybe her memory was faulty or maybe…

“There wasn’t a skylight, was there?” Said Crowley, breathless. 

“There was not”. Her angel replied, cheekily, breathlessly, as he kissed the place over her heart.

As garments came off, under the angels delicate fingers, Crowley could feel the warmth of her stars combined with the warmth of her angel’s kisses on her skin. A dizzying sensation, this amount of light and love. She would soon lose everything, she was painfully aware of that. This life with Aziraphale and her love for Warlock were dual pains like the stars of Alpha Centauri. She wondered if they should be in the same grave, stars that looked like one from far, far away. Stolen moments that she could play in her head like a sad movie if the world didn’t end. There would be time later to bury, there would be time for forgetting and doing it all over again, but for now she could feel the heat of the suns as she kissed her angel, nebulas in her hand as she ran her fingers through his hair. Comets inside her when he was inside her. Starlight all around them when they finally slept, curled around each other, the way it was always supposed to be.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos if you haven’t buried your pain deep enough in your chest and it still makes you cry!! (forgive my weird notes)
> 
> Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it <3
> 
> (Follow me on my tumblr the-character if you want some multi-fandom binge-posting nonsense)


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